Bend Over for These Nine Hot Reviews

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Reviewed are Mills’ FOLSOM PRISON (TitanMen.com), BEARS @ WORK (CyberBears.com), MASTERS & SERVANTS (RagingStallion.com), XXX FOOT SEX (PacificSunEntertainment.com), SPORTY BALLS (HelixStudios.net), TOTAL IMPACT and 19 GOOD MEN (BijouWorld.com), FAN BASE (PacificSunEntertainment.com), and softcore HELL’S GROUND (TLAReleasing.com)

Alex, Giger, Chad, Dak, Damien, Derek, Diesel, Sol, Ram, Ford, Rick, Buff, Trey, Vinnie D'Angelo -- Just the cast’s names in Brian Mills’ FOLSOM PRISON (TitanMen.com) could have you hard and hand-jobbing before you even play this masterful movie. It’s very much in the Joe Gage tradition of virile men testing their own and one another’s masculine limits. There’s no question of homosexual acts being equated with femininity. The gayer, the butch-er. Men not only get fucked, fisted, and pissed on. They get watched being fucked, fisted, and pissed on (once through one-way glass, and one interrogation-room door is left wide-open!). It’s part of the humiliation and the heroism of a world where “homo” is a Latin word, meaning “Man.” Some of the widescreen images of males in uniforms (prisoners, prison guards) and out of them against basic black backgrounds could be murals in the catacombs of a testosterone-driven religion. Buy or see it HERE.

BEARS @ WORK (CyberBears.com) by Ken Slater is a short, deft little three-scene movie whose cast of nine probably far outweigh all fourteen in Folsom Prison. The place where two quartets (one with a sling) and a trio make the earth shake is a DVD warehouse. The fellows wear sleeveless, open plaid shirts, beards (often gray), and boots which sometimes get sniffed. Some are uncut, one is black, and two shower together. Thirty-two minutes of behind-the-scenes and outtakes are pretty hilarious stuff! Read a synopsis and buy HERE.

Director Herve Bodilis’ MASTERS & SERVANTS (RagingStallion.com) is an elegant widescreen travelogue around a genuine European mansion where a manservant sniffs the master’s underwear and gets his dick sucked by a fellow-servant by dawn’s early light. Looking red-gold, they rim and fuck on master’s bed. Elsewhere, a boyish bell-servant takes off his shirt before a master and another servant, apparently to try on uniforms, but never gets re-dressed. Two chauffeurs use a back seat, then two young diners after lunch perform abominations on the cleared table. It’s hard to tell who’s master and who’s man in two more threesomes handsomely-set in a leather-chaired parlor and a brocade-chaired one. You can buy lots of Raging Stallion movies HERE and see a TRAILER, pics, and a synopsis of this one HERE.

A number of moviemakers might dispute the promotional claim that “Only in the sick mind of director Chimera Chase can a loving foot massage lead directly to hardcore fucking!” but XXX FOOT SEX (PacificSunEntertainment.com) certainly does deliver what it promises. Four scenes devoted initially to oral enjoyment of pedal extremities blossom pretty quickly into regulation fellatio and sodomy, with some pedal stimulation of cocks along the way. There’s a sneaky bit of shoe-sniffing as well. The cast of eight tends to twinks and youths, with one definitely grown man, one of my favorites (because he looks so intelligent!), Mark Gilfone, having a toe-sucking good time on blond Luke Cross after a rather delightful chat at the top of the scene. Production values are simple, but everyone’s hard is in the right place. Buy it HERE. One question: did no one think to title this TOOTSIE? (Okay, throw me out and don’t let me in again, I don’t blame you.)

Masoin Coxx’s SPORTY BALLS (HelixStudios.net) is a Fratboy movie, which means that its cleancut little cuties dash about a bit in glorious California sunshine in tight football gear, shirtless basketball shorts, tight baseball gear, tight jockstraps, or tight swimming suits, before retiring into clean corners indoors among sports paraphernalia. Well, actually, one couple stay right out in that red setting sun by a flag-blue swimming pool, and a trio vigorously fuck beside that same pool in what looks like clear morning light. If there’s one thing wrong with this movie, it’s that the kids’ cocks are disproportionately large. Hey, I said, “if!” You can get lots of Helixana HERE, and TRAILERS and stills and model-photos of this one HERE, and why shouldn’t you?

Sexualized suburbia! TOTAL IMPACT and 19 GOOD MEN (BijouWorld.com) are two of fifteen 1987-1994 twink-videos by one Robert Prion which Bijou means to re-release under the overall title of NEW JERSEY TRASH. With that title, a critic would feel silly criticizing either form or content. Fortunately, aside from remarking that these movies might be a dub or two down the line, there’s no need to criticize either1992’s TOTAL IMPACT hops right into a load-spurting threeway among teddy bears, visits a classic blond/blond cornholing in a cornfield, and offers us full-haired, sit-com honeys in a solo and duos and trios and oen foursome in a bed, a garage, a breakfast nook, and various very believable living-rooms. For collectors, Joey Stefano pops up in one scene. 1993’s 19 GOOD MEN, featuring slightly older lads, is sometimes a notch upscale (two dreamboats do it beside an apparently private swimming pool), sometimes a notch downhill (two guys knocking through a plasterboard wall take a break for a fourway). One bedroom may be in a trailer house, and one guy plays a private slot machine! Is that up- or down-scale? There’s quite an energetic final fiveway. Buy these and many other Bijou movies, trashy or not, HERE. In one scene in each movie, there’s a huge Bette Davis portrait beside a console TV!

Refreshingly eccentric and original, FAN BASE (PacificSunEntertainment.com), a lost 2005 movie reportedly rather dramatically rescued from oblivion, is titled as Episode One of “The Punkspunk Series.” Well, as the kids say, “It’s all that.” Shot with a sometimes dizzy-making mobile camera, often from way down on the ground, it flings us right into an unexplained punk-twink fourway in a rather lush pad filled with gonzo artwork. Afterward, the four bop through a chilly-looking city park where they encounter square-jawed Houston Bernard, apparently a singing idol. Nitty-gritty footage of New York streets and underground clubs fits right in with the largely ‘average-looking” cast. Three, including a real pudge, perform abominations in an empty club, rehearsing to do a “show” for Bernard. Bernard plays and sings on the collaged stage of a joint called “Boy’s Room” while the lads sing back-up and/or suck cock (it’s all rather MTV-cut). Suddenly back at the lush pad, two dudes do it in a wading-pool in the living room. Two others seem to be at the DJ’s stand in a closed club. A third joins them and they move to the dancer’s stand. Available for purchase nowhere else but HERE.

Plugged on its case as “Pakistan’s first splatter film,” softcore HELL’S GROUND (TLAReleasing.com) reaches us through a string of companies called “Danger After Dark,” “Mondo Macabro,” and “Bubonic Films.” Ghastly gore-camp is, apparently, international. So is its morality. In 1950s American drive-in trash, it was sex which drew supernatural wrath down upon teenagers. Here, it’s lying to parents and skipping evening prayers. Five Americanized students (one tells her servant, “Chill, girl”) play hooky to hit a rock concert in a tacky van. They must pass through thoroughly-polluted Hell’s Ground, an area where “many people have gone missing over the years.” Their defiant dialogue is half in subtitled Pakistani, half in charming British-accented English, but it’s all familiar: “No other cars on this road.” “Wonder why?” “Wait here. I’ll go down and have a look.” How far past that can the Living Dead be? The surefire formula of teens and zombies is made fresh again by the Pakistani faces and voices. A side-thought of mine: did you ever wonder why the zombies don’t just eat each other? Have a ball reading the titles and capsule descriptions of Danger After Dark movies such as “Meatball Machine” and “Suicide Club” HERE. Read hilarious rave reviews of this one and buy it HERE.

RETURN TO THE CAFFE CINO is a big., thick book packed with 22 plays, 37 brief memoirs, and 51 photos from the Greenwich Village storefront coffeehouse which was THE BIRTHPLACE OF OFF-OFF BROADWAY AND OF GAY THEATRE. For the HARDCOVER edition, go HERE. For the PAPERBACK edition, go HERE.

SEE ME ON VIDEO along with many other living legends of underground theatre HERE. Go down to the segment marked THE CAFFE CINO (00:11:45) and click on WATCH SEGMENT. If you are then curious to know yet more about the Caffe Cino, you may find the Contents Page to fifty-four picture pages about it HERE.

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